Monday, 26 September 2016

My not so secret shame: Survivor Recap Ep. 15

Episode 15: The episode where shit got real...

We start our episode with Flick, clearly impressed with the fact that she got Connor voted out. Karma my friend...that's all I have to say. There is a clear divide between the tribe - the original Gryffindors and then the rest of the newbies with Kylie. It is kind of turning into 'goodies versus baddies'...but some of the baddies aren't really baddies... but some are... it's complicated...

Speaking of Good vs Bad, Kylie and Kate are talking about finding all the goodies and making a super alliance to get those baddies out. We are talking about you Flick...you and your buddies! To be honest I'm still disappointed with Hot Sam and his dog move against Connor... so I'm hoping he is going to redeem himself tonight. Flick, Elle and Brooke are planning on getting Kate out next, using their little puppets, that are the boys. Kate decides to make a move and draws a nice little picture in the sand for Lee and Hot Sam, basically telling them they are little pawns and will eventually get voted out. So they all conspire together and decide to vote out... Nick... Why though? Wouldn't it be smarter to get rid of one of the three girls? They are all in a strong alliance and call all the shots so... why not break up the band? I don't get it... I should be on this show, but I actually like showers... and not being severely malnourished...

The girls create their own beauty salon, because they only JUST realised they stink. The two boys, Lee and Hot Sam approach Kristie to join their little, "Get rid of Nick" plan they have going on. As if she is going to say no to them... but then again... it's Kristie... enough said... Watch out boys, she might try and control your mind with her crazy eyes... Nick is busy being bossed around by the girls, who basically bully him into voting for Kate at the next tribal council, he's their little bitch. He wants Sue to go because, all together now, "She voted him out last time and he wants revenge blah blah blah..." Sue seems to reciprocate the feelings and wants to vote Nick out.

The Immunity Challenge... So I wasn't actually watching this when it was happening and totally didn't know what was going on... but it took me about 2 seconds to figure it out... They have a ring and must spin a ball around the ring... if your ball falls out that's bad, if you ball stays in, thats good. These challenges are just getting REALLY intense now they have merged.... first a 'hug the pole' session and now 'swing a ball around a ring' one... next time it'll be, "Pin the vein on Anthony LaPaglia's Brothers arm." They all drop out pretty quick, only 4 left at 14 minutes. Anthony Lapaglia's Brother commentates the whole thing... like how do you commentate this to make it interesting? He says things like "Sam and Elle have a chat" or "Elle sings to herself."... We know... we can see them... we are watching it happen as you're saying it. We're all of a sudden at the 1 hour down mark and Lee and Elle are the only ones left. By this point, even Anthony LaPaglia's Brother sounds bored out of his mind and his enthusiasm has gone from a level 7 to a solid 2... Elle eventually won and everyone, including half of Australia are happy this thrilling challenge took as long as it did, and is over... FOREVER.

Ok so, we are all talking about voting everyone out again. Meanies are still voting for Kate and I'm hoping Hot Sam and Lee actually stick to the plan and vote Nick out with the goodies. Come on Hot Sam, now is your chance to redeem yourself for the whole Connor incident... Kylie all of a sudden is all buddy buddy with the girls... they don't like you... go with the Goodies! Why is everyone being so annoying! You're all losing your minds... Then bloody Kylie goes and blabs to Brooke... bloody hell... Ok, now I get why no one likes her! So obviously Brooke tells Flick and they are super pissed at Hot Sam. Brooke even says, "Im so mad, after tonight I'm not going to talk to him"... coz we're all in primary school and he can't play with us anymore. So now everyone is pissed off and Hot Sam is getting an ass whooping from the girls, everyone is confused and annoyed and I'm annoyed by everyone. So who is going to get voted out? I don't even know anymore...

We are now at Tribal Council... It's all still very dodgy, Kate is the only one who seems to know what's happening and is pretty sure she is going home tonight. I hope not because she seems like such a chiller. Kate does get bit sassy and basically says the mean girls are planting seeds and everyone is just going along with it. Good on you girlfriend, you might as well just put it all out there, you have nothing to lose, and they are really giving me the shits so I agree with you. Nick pipes up and says something about... I don't know, something stupid, but then says he, "Considers Kate a good friend" and he gets a good eye roll from everyone. Kate doesn't take his crap and just says he is a liar, he says he has never lied and Hot Sam disagrees and says yep, you're liar, Nick says no he isn't and everyone is getting visibly pissed off with all the bullshit coming out of Nick's mouth... Lee openly says he is getting bored of listening to him. Lee's actually getting really pissed off and says this whole thing has made him change his mind of how he wants to vote, I reckon he would be scary to have a fight with. Super nice people can be really scary when they're mad. God Kate has really started something here hasn't she? If Nick plays the Immunity Idol, I swear... I will just sit here and complain... because what else can I do? NOTHING! Oh fuck, Nick plays the stupid Immunity Idol... and Kate gets voted out.

Now I'm really pissed. I'm so annoyed at everyone who didn't vote for Nick. Kylie, that was such a dog act and you of all people should be voting for the goodies considering the others have been horrible to you. As for the Bitchy Brigade, you're all equally annoying, you have ashamed yourselves and your village. I'm so glad this episode is over so I can go and rant and not like you in peace.

BAH! What a yucky end to that episode. I need to go and find some serious zen now... I shall return in a peaceful state for tonight...
*Insert stomping and door slam*

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